You'll Never Find a More Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy. We must be cautious.

Dad says that is what Obi-Wan would have said had he ever visited Rock Port, MO, where we are spending the night. Dad is going to sleep in the truck and guard it with a broken beer bottle he found in the motel parking lot.

Dad took some pictures of the place to post them later, but the cops confiscated the memory card because Dad accidently captured images of a couple of midwestern thugs vandalizing the state troopers' car...while they were in it.

I've been in communicado because of a spotty internet connection at our last couple of hotels. We stayed at a neat little motel in Evanston, WY called the Prairie Inn on Wednesday night. The next morning, Dad met a fellow West Virginian at the diesel pumps. When the guy found out where Dad was from, he called out to his son, "Hey, here's another West By God boy." You see, when West Virginians tell you where they are from, they say West By God Virginia. The man Dad met at the gas station told him that his son had been sent to the principal's office for cursing when he said West By God Virginia. The man had to explain to the principal that the expression was not a curse because it was short for West By the Grace of God Virginia.

Last night we stayed in Sidney, NE. Dad talked the desk clerk into giving him the senior citizen discount, despite the fact that the desk clerk was a Longhorn and Dad's dad is an Aggie.

Anyway, I have to go cover Dad from the window with a street howitzer while he makes his way to the moving truck. Stay tuned tomorrow to find out how we escape from here.